Guest article contributed by Wanda Ortiz, JFC Staffing Companies. Professional Development Class of 2017.
As is commonly the case with the ongoing process of emotional development, my emotional response to triggers has shifted and evolved as I’ve grown older. Common to any process is a series of successes and failures. My use of emotional intelligence frequently encounters challenges that are often the result of my reactions to difficult situations. Through JFC’s Professional Development Program, I have examined and identified various triggers that often lead a personal loss of patience and emotional hijacking, while effectively developing the skillset to produce a constructive end result.
Try to identify a previous conversation that has escalated to the point that your reactions were less than desirable and lacked clarity of thought. Perhaps your loss of control led to regretting something you said or did “in the heat of the moment”. Such scenarios commonly result in feelings of embarrassment, anger, bitterness, or remorse. While the common desire is to avoid repeating negative behavior, in reality, that is often not the case. Without identifying the triggers that causes the negative emotional response, we find ourselves in a repetitive cycle that only leads to greater frustrations.
The Emotional Intelligence 2.0 book and class discussions provided subtle tools that allow me to assess a situation quite quickly and provided an appropriate positive emotional response—particularly and importantly, a response that I do not regret.
“Anyone can become angry – that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way – this is not easy.” – Aristotle
The ability to self-manage and to have self-control is critical for someone in my position. It is counterproductive to create a working environment that is dictated by an individual’s current mood. Emotional intelligence, when used to its greatest affect, produces feelings of satisfaction, happiness, and calm, and are trademarks of a positive workplace. Poorly chosen words and tones, combined with reactive behaviors are often the source of negative emotions in any company. My anew sense of self-awareness is the key to identifying my triggers quickly while preventing me from losing my patience and control, thus avoiding emotional-hijacking. By pausing, processing and then stating (a form of self-control) I can better prepare and produce verbal and written responses that are absent of negative reactions and inappropriate emotional responses.
While future conversations and certain situations will quite possibly continue to challenge my emotional intelligence, I feel I am better prepared to take on and manage these difficult situations due to participating in JFC’s Professional Development program and the review of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 book.
Please share your thoughts in the comments section below as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.
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